Hello ladies...need advice!

Hello you awesome ladies out there, I am in need of your advice again. We were planning to go to India in the next 15 days (but deep down I knew that some panga or issue my inlaws will create while i am over there or after we come back, but they exceeded my expectation by creating issue before we have started packing our stuff.) As you know they have been very rude to me from the day i got married, humiliated my parents, specially my mother. They dont give me or my parents any respect but expect all kinds of respect in return. They did not even call my father after he had a major accident to ask about his well being but expect them to call them. I asked my father o stop calling them after that incident (especially because my fil was more worried dh having to spend money now to send me to India if my father was in a critical condition). They are always worried only about money. People should just spend on them and always e under their thumb for they have taken great care of their sons ( like we toh our orphans, our parents donated us to church to take care). All kinds of worldy respect they want while my mil n fil will not call or respect anyone.

Anyways so dh booked the tickets and both international and domestic. Its been 2 years of marriage, I expect at-least some level of independence of making decisions and expected them to be okay with it (and how naive am I, but I knew they will do drama about that). So dh sent them the itinerary of our visit and I waited patiently for the bomb to explode. And explode it did....

Dh took this call in my absence as he was away but he told me about this, about what all they said. All rude comments. Things like he is not a good son. He did not ask them before booking domestic flights about when to go to my place, (when we consulted my mil after marriage about when to go to my place, she said there is not auspicious days so you wont go, and she is saying the same now also as I had expected, knowing this me and dh had decided to book the tickets without asking). Then they also have been trying to stalk me on fb and whatnot, to try and keep a tab on my activities. I have never felt more violated in my life. Dh said he is used to it , they have done this to him also. Somewhere my uncle had asked when are we coming to India, and I might have replied to him that maybe in the mid of the year(like you generally tell anyone when you are planning to come), so now they feel that we knew about are plans from 3 months back but are telling them right now because we dont respect. They questioned my and dh's relationship, saying he dsnt keep me in check and dsnt control me like a husband should. And lots of other things like we dint ask their permision before booking tickets. My parents dint call them to ask about sending me.(I have asked my parents not to call them anymore, because I dont know when they will say something rude and bad and if they hurt my parents once more I will totally lose it and probably end the marriage). And also i was planning to come back to inlaws place before coming back to US, and they said what is the need to come back before going, to show us stuff she got from her parents. They even said that there is no need to come to dh and a lot of other stuff and rude remarks about my parents. I m so furious at them I might jst explode myself. My parents are so happy about this trip but all his parents do is create more and more issues.

Dh is very upset with them and said its like they are forcing us to cut ties with them. I have never felt more outrage in my life. Dh is considering cancelling the plan and sending me to my parents to visit them and come back as I haven't seen them for 2 years after marriage. Or if we go we will have standing reservation in a hotel so that we can leave their place if it become unbearable.

What do u ladies advise I should do now? If we do go show do you think I should behave with them? I have half a mind of showing them their true face and the bitter truth about their personality, but then I dont want to hurt dh who has always supported me. He dsnt aggressively defend me but he supports me, which is okay, i dont want him to disrespect his parents either. But the situation is so bad right now, I dont know how to behave with them. Please advice ladies.

There is more but right now I am just too angry to write anything else. Apologies for the long post.

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Hello ladies...need advice!