My first cycle IUI treatement has been started.I put on weight already.I am going for work also.I would like to know if i can go for walking during this time? Any one who undergone this treatment can advise me the Dos and donts during IUI treatment
Thanks
Anitha
I had very good density hair naturally.I did u cut 7 years before and it was awesome.
Then 5years before i did straightening and which also suited me.But I had hair fall now density gone.Can i change the hair style now? which one will suit me?
any hair stylists can suggest me pls?
Thanks
Anitha
All times are GMT +5.5. The time now is 10:41 AM.
Our weighing days:
Sep 1
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Sep 30
Teams:
Team 1:50-55 kg
Team 2:55-60 kg
Team 3:60-70 kg
Team 4:Above 70 kg
Joining format
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Sep 1st weight-
Sep target weight-
Link to the spread sheet to maintain our data.
http://ift.tt/1r1WTpu
We raise our own challenges and assign 1 point per day if followed.
We re new our challenges or [COLOR=#009900 !important]continue[/COLOR] the same once in every 10 days on our weighing days.
Good Luck Dears!
Please check out the link..
How can he do this?
I do not know if people think I am overeacting but this is far from cute!
The baby sure looks very cute but not the action!
I felt actually bad for the child.It is not good for the baby,as he is making it walk faster that the child actually can and he is increasing speed and scaring the child?
In the name of cuteness,why do people do some cheap thrills?
Also,I saw another video where a dad scared his child and when the baby cringed in fear..he thought it was cute!
And posting all this in facebook and with hundreds of people liking it..what is all this?
I cannot speak to him when he gets up - now only I got up.not now.
or when he goes to office -am just starting my day.not now.
or when in office - day is too hectic.now now.
when he comes back - I am tired.not now.
when he is eating - allow me to eat in peace.not now.
after he finished eating - I need some rest.now now.
before going to bed - I need a break.watching some sports.not now.
When the hell would I talk to him???what is this?I am not a bloody roommate?
If I get angry and tell him that..he will be like "go and see every other couple.noone sits and chats.people r so busy.go do some work"
I got sooooooo mad.I started picking up fights and then I keep quiet.I see him then coming and talk to me.Aha! that's the trick.
I started fighting more and more and then keep quiet.After the fights,he keeps talking to me and trying to comfort me.I love that.
I realised one thing..for the past two months EVERYDAY we have fought a lot! Now,I do not like that.
I am getting too frustrated.Took it to another level!Today I did not even want to look at him.I banged the door on his face and went to the other room.In a way,I feel relieved.I am waiting for him to come to me.Once,he comforts me sometimes we even have makeup sex.What the heck???????Now,am thinking.."where is this marriage heading?things should not work this way."
Bluntly,I am very very very very bored with him if we do not fight.probably he is too.Only when we fight,we talk and things lead to other things.I don't know what to do.
I was induced Thursday morning around 5am, and I labored naturally as long as I could. By 6pm or so, I was still only at 5cms, and requested the epidural. I was fully ready and prepared for no pain-meds, but with the slow progression I just couldn't take the pain anymore.
Baby Emma was born at 8:43pm, weighing 7lbs 1oz and 20 inches long. I am totally in love with her, Daddy is completely smitten, and we are all enjoying watching her and listening to her sweet sounds. Nursing is going great, and she seems like a natural!
Picture overload!
Got a doubt...I got meagrely hurt in a small accident few days back which I told only to my h & doctor bro. I did not tell it to my parents as they will feel worried. Today my bro had revealed it to my parents & when I was skyping with h my dad called me on phone & started asking why i did not tell him & started advising me worriedly..H on the other hand cut the call and msged me gud nite..After talking to dad when I pinged him he was all upset & I was angry as to why he did it..
(H doesnt like me sharing such bad things with parents..He tells he doesnt want to make my parents feel depressed. He rarely calls them & when we go home they all are cordial thats it & am still confused of whether he really cares for my parents.)
He was sullen & I confronted him..He asked why I revealed it..I told I never did & bro did that..He started asking sorry many times & gave gyan of how a doc should be..
I was rather irritated..He suddenly started crying & told that he felt bad for the accident & how he failed in his duty of taking care of me & that I am his possession & I should share all my pains with him only & that he wont leave me to anybody..
He is v competitive with my parents.. He compares his gifts with theirs & feel jealous..I openly asked him whether he is feeling possessive or what & his ans was may be.. I assured that you both are 2 poles & there is no room for comparison..
He concluded you will never know what is running inside me..
I love my parents so much & enjoy sharing, gossiping with them..Am literally afraid he would start restricting me..
How to handle this tactically? How to put some sense into him that I need some space to do what is comfortable for me?
Instead of speaking in an offensive tone about your MIL and SIL, speak in a sympathy seeking manner, where he will realise that you are the one who is being victimised, and he will start sympathising with you.
Please suggest excellent doctors/ hospitals in Secunderabad side who try their best for normal delivery. I have heard good reviews about Fernandez and Rainbow, Banjara Hills but these are very far from where I live.
I keep hearing of doctors doing C-sections everywhere which I am not keen on. If anybody has first hand experience of having normal delivery without episiotomy in this part of Hyderabad, your suggestions would be very helpful.
Also, if anybody has had their delivery done by Dr. Bhavana Kasu of Rainbow, Vikrampuri or Dr. Hemalatha C. of Parvathi nursing home, Vikrampuri, then please share your experiences.
Thanks & Regards
I am an intermediate learner in stitching. i have a doubt in stitching and finishing embroidery blouses.
always embroidery is finished and then stitching is done. when we do heavy embroidery and irregular neck designs, i find it very difficult to do the finishing.
for eg, pls refer to this blouse design,
http://ift.tt/1sST7Nm
here the back neck contains flower shapes. after finishing the embroidery how to stitch the blouse along with lining. in this neck design hemming wouldn't be a good option i suppose so...am i right?
i usually attach the wrong sides of the cloth and lining (with sewing machine) and then turn the cloth along the neckline. but when heavy embroidery is done, i find it very difficult to stitch with machine. do i have to hand stitch or is there any spl technique. i am a self learner and wish stitching experts could help me in this....
thanks in advance and am so happy to be a part of IL's :) :)
Cheers,
Nirmal
Life is a continuous challenge......dont forget to live in the present !!!
All times are GMT +5.5. The time now is 04:24 PM.
Reacting to the anti-rice campaign of Shanvy, Pushpavalli butts in to make her point that rice or no rice, Old age has its toll! Jayasala has probably had too much of this ‘It is Kaliyuga! What else can you expect?’ and she comes with an entirely new perspective about the Yuga calculation. She concludes with a reassuring forecast that in another 70 years we may get into the Tretha Yuga, the Yuga that gave us the ‘Ram Rajya’!
RGS has as usual packed some brilliant stuff under his terse monosyllabic titles and after telling us that if we feel grief over some loss, others are in greater grief over bigger losses, he walks away flashing one of his famous smiles surveying all the lively goings on en route to his office. At the time of writing this summary of all the nominations, I am told that the abusive telephone calls have forced powerpuffgal to seek the help of Blossom, Bubbles and Buttercup to get rid of the evil callers.
JustMyself feels enormously benevolent these days because she is a firm believer in the butterfly effect of good deeds done and she knows that this will eventually make Jayasala’s predictions come true! The Good Samaritan that is Naksh issues yet another cautionary notice about Job Postings. Quebec wants Satchi to keep spinning a tale not realizing that it is for others to carry on with this spinning as she is right now on medication for her spinning head! Shalu is researching into a new kind of madness called FB that has gone viral and none of her readers is able to provide her any clue about how to contain this menacing epidemic.
There is a very rare ‘isolated’ case of someone who having strayed away from what she wanted to be in the first instance has now declared to the world that she would eventually get to be what she really is. Good old Viswa is on a pilgrimage of love and self discovery. He wants to find out what makes Indians so courteous and compassionate. Viswa, don’t go too far for an answer. Just turn the focus on to yourself! Kamalji is not happy with the suicidal decision of Robin Williams and is appalled at the colossal waste of life but Gauri gives him some highly researched insight into the suicidal tendencies of people.
The rest of the nominations of the month are children oriented starting from TTC and an indignant foetus to the artistic tendencies of children and the uncomfortable questions they can ask! Parenting and Sibling Harmony add colour to the nominations.
I have given you a run through of all the nominations received in August. Are you still finding it difficult to guess who could be the Winner of the Finest Narration Award? Yes, my friends, I am happy to declare
Truthful answers to uncomfortable questions by guesshoo
as the Winner of the Finest Narration for August 2014.
This delightful thread has brought on a warm smile on more than 4000 faces. Need we give you a greater reason for declaring it a Winner?
Gauri03 has come out with such a profound insight into depression and its fatal ramifications that I did not have to tax my head too much in deciding on the Winner of the Finest Contribution Award for the month.
I have great pleasure in declaring
No. Depression can't simply be willed away. by Gauri03 as the Winner of the Finest Contribution for August 2014.
Hearty congratulations to guesshoo and Gauri03! I do hope that this recognition will motivate you to entertain us with more from your creative keyboard!
Hearty congratulations to Satchi and deepslikes, the first nominators of the Prize Winning entries and others who seconded these nominations.
All times are GMT +5.5. The time now is 03:23 PM.
Discuss 'Safe Apartment with Indian Community around in Mount Prospect, IL' on the 'Indians in Midwest' forum of IndusLadies; Hi, We are moving to mount prospect area, working in downtown. Looking for a safe ...
Any tamil people living in Camp Hill/Harrisburg/Mechanicsburg area? I'm looking for indian community apartments in any of these areas for family. Can you please suggest any good indian community in Camp Hill/Harrisburg/Mechanicsburg area for family.(Preferably tamil but not manadatory)
Also share yur experiences gals.... m so nervous about this make over thing,... i need a best hairdo.. on the special day :P.. will i get one????
I have a small kitchen where storage space is less. Im planning to visit Ikea in a day or two to buy some space organising cabinets and stuff. Please give some ideas and also possible links to buy that or a picture.Also my apartment is a rented one so I cannot drill and mount cabinets. So please suggest accordingly.
Back in the day when I was in better terms with her, I was feeding my kid who was then 8 months old, and she non stop spoke for 45 mins- without even stopping to catch her breath. I had to then start talking loudly to my kid to make her stop and give me the chance to speak to my own daughter.
Another incident - at the time my daughter was around 1yr one of my cousins had come and she asked the baby things like 'what all stories do u know'. Obviously the baby was too young to speak, before I cud even open my mouth to answer - pat comes my Mils reply that the baby knows ' crow and the fox' and the went in for 5 mins blah blah blah. She didn't give me a chance to speak at all. Basically, I don't get a chance to talk in her presence -she elbows me out and makes sure she gets all the attention.
A lot of times she does it subconsciously I feel.
Even if ppl are explicitly looking at me and talking, she butts in gives her useless opinions and makes ppl talk to her.
i think she has a "I have to talk all the time and other ppl shud also talk only to me" disorder.
living with her for 5 years, it makes me go nuts.
This seems to be her basic nature- that conversations and the world should all revolve around her.
Any tactful way of showing her how obnoxious she is other than having to out-shout her all the time?
My 2 month old baby is still not latching properly and therefore I am expressing milk every 2-3 hours. However, the amount of milk produced every time i pump is only 1-2 oz. I have tried all medications such as fenugreek, garlic, tons of water etc. But, there is no improvement. due to this, I am forced to feed my baby with formula since birth. I feel quite helpless and not sure if I will ever be able to increase breast milk quantity. Please can you all pour in your suggestions to produce more milk?
Thanks!
Need help! I have a prestige pressure cooker and need gasket for it. I am unable to see what is written under the cooker but I measured my current gasket its 10.5 inches and I want to know how many liters is my cooker. Need answer as soon as possible becoz hubby is in India and I need gasket.
Thanks in advance friends!
All times are GMT +5.5. The time now is 11:06 PM.
I am married for 4 years and trying to conceive since 1 year but not yet successful. Also I had one miscarriage last year and since then this is not clicking. Can you please provide your advise. Also have some health issues like kidney related problem and worried because of that as want to conceive before anything comes up.
My details are as below.
BirthPlace : Mumbai
Birth date : 27 Sep 1981
Birth time : 10.27 am
All times are GMT +5.5. The time now is 08:58 PM.
I and my son went for a vacation to our homeland, India for 2 months. My husband is supposed to come 15 days before this vacation ends and we planned on visiting his native and go back home to US. So I would stay in my house for 1.5 months.
Last time I visited India, 2 yrs back, just me and son, not my husband, I visited my inlaws who stay in a diff State, then I and MIL ended up fighting, which disturbed me a lot and decided not to visit them without husband. This time, my husband is reaching early morning of the day and he decided to travel to him place next day, stay there for 12 days, return back home on day or may be previous day of travel to our house.
I feel bad that he didnt even plan on staying for a day at my house, just the day of his arrival. He has some work here as well and he chose to postpone it and leave early to his house. I am highly disappointed in this. I know my MIL wouldve trained him saying she misses are and want him immediately at their house. My husband's bro came for a week to India, stayed at inlaws house for 1.5day and came to him home with wife. His wife came for 3 weeks before that.
We fought a lot on this and I am depressed why he behaves this way and goes on saying, I have 12 days etc. It may be right that he wants to visit his parents but my MIL will feel happy he did not listen to me. I am truly disappointed.
After shaving it, when do we see first signs of hair (the little spikes)? How long on average will it take to grow back (just enough to cover head)?
My daughter (8 months) has lots of hair, I have to to do ponytails, otherwise it goes in her eyes and the length is really long too.
My husband would like to get it trimmed instead of shaving it, he really likes her hair and thinks it makes her look like him :)
Any suggestions on whether I should trim or shave and how long will it take for reasonable amount of hair to grow back?
thanks,
Cooks.
All times are GMT +5.5. The time now is 04:08 PM.
All times are GMT +5.5. The time now is 04:08 PM.
I was a silent reader of the IL forum,but after seeing many forums sharing personal problem seeking advice, i thought to post it mine.
my parents are looking for marriage proposal for the past 6 years, but nothing seems to click.Everytime it will go off with horoscope mismatch, not satisfied with the profile,etc. My expectations like he should be educated, settled in a decent job and i should continue my job after marriage. Am working as a IT professional,thirty plus now.my relatives,friends always ask abt my marriage whenever i speak in person or in phone.Though its obvious, am frustrated with this question, so started avoiding friends and relatives nowadays. Am not going to any functions nor relatives house due to this. Am always sick in my mensus days due to unbearable pain(almost 5 days) for which i consulted with doctor,gettin the same replies like it can be medicated only post marriage.To add it to the above problems, now am facing problems officially as well.. Am totally depressed, now i dont have any friends to share with, the only person i can share everything is my mother(my father is no more). She always getting worried about my marriage and she got the heart problem due to this tension. I have consulted psychiatrist twice after my mom forced me to and i dont felt i should continue that.i To get away from all this, am spending more time in net and reading novels, which makes me stay late at nite (sometimes upto 2)
Friends, am not saying am the only one in the world facing all the above problems, but i cudnt bear it all this in my mind and lead a normal life.I avoided my best friends intentionally due to my personal problem and it hurts me a lot. my dear ones always advice to stay calm and have a free mind, but its not possible to do that. i always wonder what is my destiny and where it will lead me into?
I went through some trouble over last four years, waited for Mr. Prince. I eventually found him and I'm happily married to him as well .
I want to thank IL for the support it gave me during tough times. Really , ILites this site was my life saver.
Send us the showers of luck and good wishes ILites. Thank you once again.
I am 12weeks and 2 days today. We went to the doctor yesterday to hear the baby heartbeat, but it was not heard in the doppler. he then checked for ultra sound the baby was all active. my main problem is, i am still having spotting atleast once or twice a week. i would like to know if the baby is going to be fine and ill be able to have a normal delivery. i would also like to know till when is spotting common?
Thanks a lot !
Another thing is with it ganpati season I normally celebrate ganpati in a grand way however the past two years have been extremely disappointing. The reason is because last year my periods were in the way so I didn't celebrate ganpati at all. This year I started my periods on the 24th and normal 5 day cycle would end on the 29th. However I tend to go over board at least a day or two. So my mom said since it had already been my 5th day I can still celebrate ganpati. So I decided to schedule the pooja for sunday. I went shopping today after taking a shower. Bought all the mithais and everything only to come home and realize my periods are still on. So then I told my mom that they can eat everything I will just go and buy new mithai and fruits and all. She said no it's okay since it had already been my 5th day. However I grew up with my nana nani and they were extremely strict about it. So I obviously feel the same way. So in this situation I don't know whether to side with my mom or go by what I feel.
I would like to have suggestions from u ppl reg sleeping pattern of 13 months old lo.
my son is not at all sleeping in night. Even though he is playing or walking in walker in evening. He gets tired n sleeping by 10 and again wake up by 12 or 12.30 n awake till 4.30 or 5 or sometimes upto 7 in the morning. Again he is sleeping till 12 in the morning.
how to change this sleeping pattern n make him sleep whole night.
I recently arranged a pot luck for the indians in the neighborhood. Everyone wanted to meet so i look the onus of arranging a potluck. I called up everyone a month in advance. Everyone was excited. The plan was simple, meet up at my house, have appetizers, games, lunch, cleanup. Everyone would make a dish and common expenses (juices, soda, paper products) cost to be split up by person. It was fun but I had tough time overall because of some of the characteristic ladies. Here are their characters. There were at least one of each character in the group.
character 1: Called the evening before the event. She was to make rotis. I ended up making the rotis in addition to my vegetable dish. Also, had to recalculate the split cost and had to inform everyone.
character 2: Came an half an hour late to the party in a low neck sleeveless dress and all the while hang around with the gents along with her husband. I and other ladies were busy arranging, warming the food. She then went on to host the BINGO game and soon after lunch went away saying that she needs to go to another party. No help at all for cleaning. For food, she said she is working (i am working too) and got only the drinks (the cost was again shared).
character 3: Her focus was totally on her kids. She influenced the menu, my son does not like this, my daughter does not eat that. For all the fuss, she takes on the great responsibility of making rice. During the party she says she felt bad making rice only so she made a biryani (just sprinkling a few peas and jeera tadka and that's biryani!!!). The quantity was hardly enough for half of the people. And then latter she says, everyone loved my biryani, nothing is left !!! Just as we were enjoying the game, she comes to me and says her kids need to eat now. So i and few others had to leave the games and go to prepare the food. Can't her kids wait? They just had appetizers.
character 4: She said she will be four and ended up coming 8 (Had a family visiting them). Left early, need to take the family out on a sight seeing. Made daal, which was tasteless and very blend. While leaving, she said oh i don't have money right now. I will pay you later. It has been over a week now. i hate to ask for money.
Not sure if you all had experience with such ladies and how did you handle them.
But hoping all you ladies can help me understand th finance part .
For those of you who had inlaws move in to US , ho did you handle the finance part ?
are all the expenses - health insurance, their travelling etc are on you ?
in my case my husband is non cooperative. my inlaws have lot of relatives here, so they will probably be travelling a lot within US, CANADA on regular basis so i'm talking about spending $1500 tickets etc every time they travel . also my sil will be visiting more often and every time she visits my inalws expect us to help us with money . SO that will increase as well. when it comes to inlaws money properties they would give most of it to SIL. so i'm really worried that we will be spending so much throughout that we would not have money to enjoy for ourselves, my life will revolve around inlaws and relatives and making them happy .
How did you all handle finances ? did your inlaws contributed when they moved in by helping you with some ancestral property etc?
I was married two months back.My DH is very kind and friendly.I am very happy to get a husband like him.He is very affectionate and helps me in household works.I would like to ask regarding a doubt in our marital relationship.He is very anxious during our intercourse and ejaculates very soon(within a minute ).so what he does is he fingers my clitoris.I do reach climax but i heard that a women gets more pleasure when inserted and aroused.Is it true that G spot climax is more intense.Just a doubt ,but i love him a lot and i don't ask him about this.But he feels a lot disturbed that he could not do it for long to pleasure me.Just tell me friends had anyone had G spot climax and how is it different from clitoris climax????Is there a way to make him last longer??
Inspired by another thread(s):
Has anyone ever accidentally overheard, eavesdropped or snooped conversation of in-laws ? What did you discover ? I am not talking about conversations which they want you to hear, but rather their conversations about you and your family of origin which they didn't want or expect you to hear.I would be really interested in knowing what they say about me and my family as I have never understood why they behave the way they do. Never eavesdropped nor accidentally overheard.
Discuss 'Ganapathi Bapa Moraya! Celebrations 2014 and Prashad' on the 'Festivals, Functions & Rituals' forum of IndusLadies; Om Gam Ganapathaye Nama: Brought you Ganesh Chathurthi Prashad (Modak, Salt kozhukattai and Nei Appam). ...
Though an incorrigible atheist I share a love-hate relationship with Ganesha that has existed since my childhood. Even now every room in my house has a Ganesha statue , not all of them acquired by me.
In my childhood, my mother tried to make Ganesha my role model. I, at least in her opinion was a very skinny kid (Looking at photos of those days, I think I was a perfectly normal kid sizewise, at least. But my mother, to my detriment had other ideas.
She used to din into my head how Pillayar Ommachi (Pillayar is the Tamil name for Ganesha and Ommachi is kidspeak for God) had such a nice . healthy figure while I looked skinny. Every kid should follow the example of the elephant-headed lord, she kept reiterating.
And she left no stone unturned to ensure that I acquired a “healthy” ganeshish look.. My breakfast every day comprised an egg’ with dollops of honey, malt-flavoured shark liver oil and full cream milk . Lunches and dinners were laced with ghee., Deep fried snacks, big fat potato paranthas dripping with ghee , matar-paneer with the paneer fried , (do I need to repeat?,) in ghee formed frequently recurring parts of my diet, not to speak of ghee-laden (Oh I am getting bored repeating this) suji halwa..
Before you could say Om Ganeshaya Namah 108 times I acquired my mother’s idea of a healthy look and only a trunk was missing to complete my turning into a Ganesh clone. If you have seen photos of Mukesh Ambani’s kid you’will know what I mean. He is the exact replica of my childhood days.
Dad knew that my mother was taking me down a dangerous path but he didn’t want to get into an argument with momma dearest. As he knew it was a waste of time. My dear mom had very rigid, dogmatic notions about everything including health. For her healthy food was synonymous with rich food. She was totally calorie unconscious. And any questioning of her ideas was bound to lead to a serious domestic strife.
So he tried in his own way to burn the extra calories by encouraging me to participate in sports. But that was the wrong approach with a kid who preferred to sit and read a book rather than go out and play.. Finally he threw down the towel and left me to my fate.
This led to a very lopsided development. When kids of my age were reading comics, I was reading Tales from Shakespeare, Erle Stanley Gardner and P.G.Wodehouse. but while they were burning their calories with outdoor activities I was extending horizontally.
But I gradually realized that Lord Ganesha was a very bad role model . Immortals gods can afford the luxury of potbellies but not poor mortals like me. I took to brisk long walks to get rid of my tons of fat.
After marriage when my wife staged a domestic coup d’etat and took over the kitchen. My diet plan changed and with some prodding from her I joined a gym in my club Yoga, aerobics and regular workout on the treadmill and weights training helped me lose the truck tyre around my waist. So it was finally goodbye to Ganesha look.
Even now though I work out regularly in my home gym, I also go to the historic Lodhi Garden near my place regularly during weekends. The main purpose of this is not just exercise but to get what is known in my home as EEs. That is the abbreviation for educative experience.s Every time I go there, I see huge guys who could be easily mistaken for massive rolling balls from a mistance. When they near you they look as if they could even make Lord Vigneswara burn with envy as they easily beat him in the belly sweepstakes.
These guys are my EEs. By their very presence they educate me about the need to control my weight.
Even now when I get up in the morning I look at the Ganesha Idol perched on my TV before I leave for my workout. The guy is again a role model for me. This time he reminds me that I should not look like him.
Apart from my weight issue, I am also fascinated by the symbolism of Ganesha. He is part man part beast . And in his hand he holds the goad that is used to control the elephant.. His figure sends out a clear message that the means of controlling the beast in us is with us. and all we have to do is to find it. What a pity if the entire humanity had found its goad, whole lot of misfortunes ranging from rapes to wars could have been prevented.
.
But, Ganesh Chaturti has the dubious distinction of being the first Hindu festival to be turned into a public show. While this fever was prevalent in Maharashtra, it has spread to several states. Making a song and dance out of your religious belief has become the in thing now.
The most nightmarish part of it is the immersion of Ganesha idols big and small in water bodies. At a time when potable water is becoming increasingly scarce resource immersing idols looking colourful with their toxic chemical paints in rivers and seas only adds to water pollution. Before you yell at me that sea water is not potable, let me hasten to add that the toxic chemicals from the idols could endanger marine life.
And oh oh, why the hell can’t people keep their religion in their private spaces instead of poisoning our air and water and blasting our eardrums with what people like me feel is noise and the gullible oops sorry the devout feel is religious music?
I have been thinking of discussing this problem of mine with someone, but since I am not able to discuss this with my relatives nor friends I finally decided to post it here. I do not think anybody in this forum (or anybody in this world ) would have faced this problem. I have been married for 8 yrs now & have a child 6.5 yrs old. My problem is that my husband is a very unromantic person. During early years of marriage, he used to be mamma's boy & we used to have frequent fights due to MIL issues mainly because she was against our marriage. But somehow we overcome all that & have completed 8 yrs now. The problem is not he being a mamma's boy or MIL issues, the problem which is eating me from inside is his being unromantic to the extent that he is not at all interested in any kind of physical relation with me. I know people would not even believe if I say that in these 8 years of marriage, we had sex only 1-2 times (that too because I took initiative). By god's grace luckily in the 2nd time I got pregnant & now we are parents of a 6.5 yr old girl. After my pregnancy , the distance between us has increased so much that we do not even have physical contact let alone sex, not even holding hands, a hug, a kiss or anything like that. I used to feel very hurt and irritated & so dejected that I used to show this anger on my kid for some other reason. So we have been living just liked roommates all these years now & I have never complained nor talked about it to him. He does not even seem to understand the reason of my frustration. Except any kind of physical contact, rest everything is fine like we go out for movie , we got for short holidays, dine out etc & he is also a very supportive husband in terms of helping me in my household chores, understands my office tensions etc & even the frequents of fights between us has come down after the birth of the child. But I always feel that no love exists in our relationship & that we are continuing in this relationship only for the sake of our child. Now he has gone abroad for a long term assignment & I am staying alone with my child as I am working. He is a very caring husband & a caring father in terms of everything else. Even though he is currently not in India, he calls us everyday , is chatting with me throughout , wants to see us on skype everyday & is also feeling very bored without us that he has decided to take us there by the end of this year. Would any of you reading this post be able to give me any solution? Gents out there, could you suggest me reasons as to why he lacks this interest? The only problem I feel is that he is overweight. Would that be a reason?
Vaccines to start: GSK's vaccine (GlaxoSmith Kline) an experimental vaccine for Ebola developed with the US National Institutes of health is expected to be given to health volunteers in Britain and the US from the mid of September.
i happily announce the arrival of our first child :) a healthy little baby girl of 3840 gramms, 55 cm :) we named our little bundle of joy Suraiya
I dont know how to thank or put down in words my gratefullness for all the help, support, usefull suggestions, calmings, virtual hugs and prayers and advices and simple share of thoughts and companionship during the journey.
As the list of those i want to thank to is too long i beliefe that all of you know you are meant and in my heart :) :)
Deepest thanks to all of you
Birthstory maybe coming later...
அறுகு ஓரிடத்தில் முளைத்து ,கொடி போல் நீண்டு ஆறு இடங்களில் வேரூன்றிக் கிளைக்கும் தன்மையதால் அறுகம் புல் என்று பெயர் வந்ததாகத் தெரிகிறது.
இந்த அறுகை அர்ச்சித்தால் மூலாதாரத்தில் விளங்கும் விநாயகர் ஆறு ஆதாரங்களிலும் நம்மைப் பொருந்தச் செய்து அருள் புரிவார் என யோக நூல்கள் அறிவிக்கின்றன.
யோகிகள் கடும் யோகப் பயிற்சியால் விளையும் சூடு தணிய அறுகுக் கஷாயம் அருந்துவர்.
யமன் மகனாகிய அனலாசுரன் இந்திராதி தேவர்களை விழுங்க் முயற்சித்தபோது விநாயகர் அனலாசுரனை விழுங்கவே அவர் திரு மேனியில் கடும் வெப்பம் எழுந்தது.
அந்த வெப்பம் தணிய சந்திரன் குளிரமுதம் ஊட்டினான்.
சித்தி புத்திகள் தமது குளிர்ந்த உடலால் ஒற்றினார்கள்.
திருமால் தாமரைப் பூவால் தடவினார்.
வருணன் குளிர்ந்த நீரால் திருமஞ்சனம் செய்வித்தான்.
சிவா பெருமான் ஆதிசேஷனைக் கொண்டு ஒற்றச் செய்தார்.
ஆனால் வெப்பம் தணிந்தபாடில்லை.
எண்ணாயிரம் முனிவர்கள் ஒவ்வொருவரும் 21 அறுகை இட்ட நீரைத் தனித்தனியே சொரிந்தனர். வெப்பம் தணிந்தது.அதனால் அறுகு விநாயகருக்கு விருப்பமானது.
பணம் செலவழித்து மலர் வாங்க இயலாதவர்கள் தரையில் கேட்பாரற்றுக் கிடக்கும் அறுகம் புல்லைப் போட்டாலும் விநாயகர் அருளுவார்.
Jayasala 42
சிவபிரான் ஒரு சிறிய லிங்கத்தை அளித்து " எந்த வாகனத்திலும் ஏறாது நடந்து சென்று, கீழே எங்கும் வைக்காமல் லிங்கத்தை இலங்கை எடுத்துச் சென்று வழிபட்டால் உன் விருப்பம் நிறைவேறும் என்றார்.
இராவணன் பய பக்தியுடன் இலங்கை நோக்கிப் பயணித்தான்.
ராவணனை அழிக்க இயலாதோ என அஞ்சிய தேவர்கள் ஐங்கரனைத் துதித்தனர்.
விநாயகரின் ஆணைப்படி வருணன் ஏழு நதிகளையும் இராவணன் வயிற்றில் நிரப்பச் செய்தார்.
ராவணன் கையில் சிவ லிங்கத்தை வைத்துக் கொண்டு சிறுநீர் கழிக்க இயலாமல் தவித்தான்.
அப்போது விநாயகர் சிறுவன் வடிவில் தோன்றவும், அவரிடம் சிவலிங்கத்தைக் கொடுத்து விட்டு சிறுநீர் கழிக்கச் சென்றான் .
வருணன் நிரப்பிய நீர் நில்லாமல் சுரந்த வண்ணம் இருக்க விநாயகர் லிங்கத்தை நிலத்தில் வைத்து விட்டார்.
திரும்பி வந்த ராவணனால் சிறு லிங்கத்தைப் பெயர்க்க முடியவில்லை.முழு வலிமையுடன் இழுக்கவும் சிவலிங்கம் பசுவின் காது போல் குழைந்து விட்டது.மேற்குக் கடற்கரையில் கோகர்ணம் என்ற பெயருடன் இன்றும் விளங்குகிறது.
இராவணன் கடும் கோபம் கொண்டு விநாயகரின் தலையில் குட்ட ,விநாயகர் விண்ணளவாக உயர்ந்து ராவணனை பந்தாடினார்.கடைசியில் ராவணன் அவரது காலடியில் வீழ்ந்து மன்னிப்பு வேண்டினான்.தன பத்துத் தலைகளிலும் இருபது கரங்களால் பல முறை மாறி மாறிக் குட்டிக் கொண்டபோது உதித்த ஓசைதான் சதுஸ்ரம்,திஸ்ரம்,கண்டம், மிஸ்ரம் ,சங்கீர்ணம் எனப்படும் ஐந்து தாள வகைகள் என்று கூறப் படுகிறது.
இராவண வதத்துக்கும்,இசையின் பிதா என்று அழைக்கப் படும் லயத்துக்கும் வழி வகுத்தவர் நம் பிள்ளையார்தான்.
இதேமாதிரி ராமர் வீடணனுக்கு அளித்த ரங்கநாத விக்ரஹத்தையும் திருவரங்கத்தில் ஆராதிக்கப் படச செய்த பெருமையும் கணபதியையே சாரும்.
Jayasala42
Yesterday was an opportunity of a lifetime. Some special passes had come, whereby u could go and come face to face with the lord, some friends wanted to kidnap me and take me toGaneshji, but I was not in the mood to go. Its just that I believe the lord is in our hearts, u pray sincerely, and see how he listens to u, at least he listens to me.
Well brother andbhabhi went, and they were zapped with the awe of Ganeshji. Here are the few pictures of the big boss, with the VIP humans, of which I am not a part of.
Well I was musing, that was it not bad of me to not have gone and paid my respects to Ganeshji when the whole world would give their left arm, to have a one to one with him, if u see the rush there, u would understand the importance of this pass, my friend must be someone more important that I thought.
With a glass of lemon juice, I was thinking over all this, wife and daughter having already retired to bed, when suddenly the door burst open, alon g with lightening, and in walks someone like Ganeshji, with a long trunk, pot bellied, and say “ Hi Kamalji”. I got scared and Bingo our Labrador started to bark, and Ganeshji did something, and I saw Bingo on the top of the fan, like Hema Malini was in Seeta aur geeta, in the police station.
Well I was convinced this is the original Ganeshji, and as I bowed down , he picked me up, and said, don’t worship me, we are friends. He sat down opposite me, and he had a big bag of ladoos which he was chomping away while talking to me.
I said “ How come Jaipur, and how come me ? I never come to visit u at Moti Doongri, then ?
Kamal , Happy premature Birthday, and many happy returns of the day. I said Ganeshji , I must wish u in fact, my birthday is on the first of September still a few days away.
Ganeshji said “ Kamal u love fishes so much, hence I kept yr birthday on the 1st of September when the sale of fishes start officially, and I make sure u have good fishes, for soon my visharjan takes place and sea gets polluted, and then u are starved of fishes . Don’t curse me Kamal, I don’t wish to drown, but people do that to me, what do I do .
“ Kamal, u see my mom Parvati, scolds me everytime Ganesh chaturvedi comes. She was telling me the other day, that she has taken my membership at a Heavenly Gym, , and she wants me to do cycling and other exercises to reduce my weight.
Tired of her nagging , I told her, people are calling me down to celebrate me, with ladoos galore, so I am going down, and I will diet after I am immersed. Since u were missing at Moti Doongri, so I came here to meet u.
I said , I am sorry I gave u this trouble to come to meet me, I am sorry, and he laughed, his belly shaking, and said, everyone reveres me kamal, but u. you treat me as u would anyone else. You talk to me in the bathroom, in yr office, u are casual with me.That is what I like, that u treat me like a friend, and not like God.
Kamal , u don’t see me with yr eyes, but u see me with yr heart, and u keep me there, along my other collegues. We are very happy there, and we see the world from yr eyes.( We close our eyes at times, when u see some things that we are not supposed to see, u see !} People give me respect for these 11 days, and then they put me to sea to drown. Am I that bad , kamal ?
I said Ganu ( we had become informal by then), I can never understand whey they don’t keep u all thru the year. Is this not like bringing in yr [parent from an old age home, keep them at home for 11 days, feed them, bathe them, take good care of them, and then , 12th day take them back to the old age home eh ! and remember them next year ?
Kamal, this has become a ritual a money making one, as u can see . Why do people have to keep me at all. So much money is spent on my idols, and later the sea is flooded with me, polluting and killing the fishes in the sea, is that fair ? Traffic blocked, workers absent, taking advances and leaves, is that what I stand for , kamal ?
I asked Ganu for a few ladoos, he was going on eating them, bingo was scared and peeing from the fan, too scared to yelp, and I told Ganu have mercy on Bingo, and whoosh, Bingo came down, and tail between legs ran away leaving the two of us alone.
Ganu would not give me even a single ladoo, and then I lost my cool and told him, Ganu I curse u , that u wull get diabeties soon, with all the sweets u are eating, and not parting with one to me, then he gave me one, and smiled. He is one chingu/ kanjoos/stingy God.
I told him I will take him for a check up after Ganesh Chaturvedi, and he said, we gods don’t get diabeties. Ho ! Ho! Ho! He found that funny eh ! I did not for my eyes were on the ladoos.i had one and it was delicious.
He said , kamal I know u will blog about this, go ahead, let the nonbeleivers know that Ganu exists, and tell them, that Ganu will be happy and bless them if they post their comments on this blog, otherwise, let them beware !!!!!
It was past midnight, and Ganu said, tomm is my stapna, I must leave, I have so much to do, but I will keep in touch with u kamal, and if u need anything, do let me know.
Whoosh, and he was gone, the door closed, the lights dimmed, so friends , I passed on his message to u guys ald gals, now it is up to u ot just read, or post comments.
HAHA
KAMAL MAHTANI
Terrible english by PT sir:
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1) There is no wind in the football.
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2) I talk, he talk, why you middle middle talk?
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3) you rotate the ground 4 times.
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4) you go and understand the tree.
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5) I'll give you clap on ur cheeks.
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6) Bring your parents and your mother and especially your father.
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7) Close the window airforce is coming.
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8) I have two daughters and both are girls.
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9) Stand in a straight circle.
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10) Dont stand in front of my back
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&the best one...
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11) Why Haircut not cut?
: A Woman driver's answer for not using INDICATOR.....
"Why should I use Indicator?
Where I am going is None of Your business."😛
Parvati: Gannu, baby, you really should start gymming now.
Ganpati: I'm not fat, I'm pleasantly plump.
Parvati: Er, ya, but you could be fitter- like your Dad.
Ganpati: Not again ma! And it's okay. I charm people anyway.
Parvati: That you do, hun! Love you baby
Ganpati: Love you too ma, miss me for ten days- I'm off for a food festival, interacting with friends, fans and followers! And ya, if Hanuman comes with another gym membership offer for me, tell him 'NOT INTERESTED' happy Ganesh Chaturthi week
Husband wife both die in a car crash. Husband becomes bhoot. Wife becomes Daayan.
They both meet after some time.
Wife: Kitne badle badle lag rahe ho bhoot bankar.
Husband: pagli, par tum bilkul nahi badli.
Still the same.
😜😜😜😜😆😆😆
This is a transparent question that where are you travelling next?????
I am an avid traveler and love exploring new hidden horizons of this mother earth. I have been to Australia, New Zealand, England, Scotland, Miami, Hawaii, Haiti, Thailand and Hongkong.
I plan an abroad trip every 6 months and next I am planning to visit Capetown in January coz I want to see Gold mines over there :)Where are you travelling next and for what reasons???
Plz comment :)
The story of the divine mango, the fight for ownership and the right to enjoy the mango between the brothers Ganesh and Muruga are known to all.
There are many key management lessons that can be imbibed and implemented for our success in career and personal front from this.
A challenge was up for grabs in the form of a mango (winning a business) and there was the competition between the brothers (vendors).
Whoever goes around the world thrice and comes first will take the business (criteria to award) was established and agreed upon.
Sage Naradha would fit in the role of the consultant - the one who creates a need (business), writes the business proposal and evaluates to finalize the winner.
What did Muruga do on hearing this? He grossly under estimated his competitors abilities (speed) and was carried away by the Ferrari (peacock) advantage he possessed versus the Maruthi 800 (mouse) of Ganesh.
What did Ganesh do on hearing this? He assessed the situation calmly and knew he can't beat Muruga and his Ferrari, Devised an innovative strategy, Effectively communicated with excellent presentation skills and Convinced the audience with an alternate solution.
The ultimate goal was to obtain the business (mango) and the skills exhibited were - Calm and cool mindset, Assessing the situation and adapting, Devising an innovative strategy, Communicating effectively with excellent presentation skills, Convincing with an acceptable logic and Implementing the strategy immediately by exhibiting timely leadership skills.
Don't you think these skills were more than good enough to win the business - the mango from Shiva Parvathi Inc. by going around them thrice, they being the world as parents to Dr. Ganesh, The Modern Management Guru.
I have completed masters in Industrial Biotechnology and have 2 years of teaching experience and 1 year as a quality analyst in an ayurvedic company in India.
I relocated to Sunnyvale in April and in June i received my EAD, i tried for biotech jobs, but didnt get any calls regarding that. Now i started my job search as a teacher.
Please help me in finding a job with your experiences.
I am feeling depressed nowadays :(
i need some guidance.i am a dentist by profession,now in Dubai.due to some license issues,can't work here.
i want to know what other kind of jobs can I try.i tried my hand at teaching and sent resume to some schools but no response.i guess market in Dubai is very competitive and needs experience.plz guide what else can I do for career as I really need to work.
regards
As for always obeying them....When will Indian 'children ' realize they are adults with brains and need not always listen and blindly follow them. Tell them you don't have to follow everything and if this continues ...you will need to find some place where you can get to live as adults.(provided you live with them).
If you don't live with them...just listen and do what you want.
1) Now,u won't know.Once ur children leave you and go,then you will find it so lonely and suffer..
2) You are a DIL now. Only when you become a MIL u will know how much we face. only when u become a MIL and your son brings a DIL no matter how good u will be,there will be an insecurity which moms of sons are bound to face.then you will know.
3) Old age is the toughest.trust me.You will crave for love and affection from others and family.
4) when you have sons and daughters and still need to go to an old age home,you will know the real pain as your heart will break.
5) karma is bound to hit back.Now, all u care is your happiness and do not bother about the elderly but u will know when u are an MIL.
6) ur mom will be an MIL soon and when she comes crying to u with her problems with DIL then u will know what I am talking about.
Nowadays,she is talking about my bro and his future wife and keeps taunting me
and trying to scare me.
I am not a 100% perfect DIL but I have a conscience.Inititally I used to be so good to MIL.She,due to her possessive nature non-stop tortured me with words and actions.How much can I tolerate?So these days I stand up for myself and she told me the above things.Now I feel so guilty and like a bad person as though I am mean to her but to be honest,I have zero love and respect for her.I lost that with her but she is still dh's mom and hence I do tolerate.
One of my friend recently had a baby and does not have any help. I am planning to send her food every weekend until her Mom arrives. Can you all pour in some ideas on ready mixes that I can give her and which will require minimal effort for her to cook.
My thoughts for now are :
1. Idly batter
2. Oats and rava idly mix ( need receipe for this)
3. Rice and dal kichadi Mix.
4. Instant powders ( Garlic, Curry leaves or coriander)
5. Oats, Barely, Almonds Kanji mix.
6.Cut some 3-5 green veggies and put in ziplock bag for them to cook later.
Any other ideas please?
I need your valuable suggestions on wedding photography and videos. My maximum budget is 50-60k will I get good quality photographers for this amount? my wedding is in Chennai please suggest me some good studios who offer decent support in affordable cost.
Awaiting your responses
use this thread for getting ur horscope related queries answered here from vedic astrologer without using computer generated software like other do...
Input your Date of Birth / Time of Birth / Place of Birth along with 1 or 2[max] questions....lagna and raasi can also be given for verification
With Regards
Mahalakshmi Astro Point
All times are GMT +5.5. The time now is 05:40 PM.
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The re-arranged skeleton of a foetus believed to have been inside a woman for 36 years. (AFP)
Nagpur: Doctors in Maharashtra have removed the skeleton of a foetus that had been inside a woman for 36 years in what is believed to be the world's longest ectopic pregnancy, a doctor has said.
Skeletal remains that were removed are seen in video footage laid out on a hospital bed, and include numerous parts of a rib cage, leg and arm bones and sections of a skull, spine and pelvis.
The 60-year-old woman became pregnant at the age of 24 but suffered a miscarriage because the foetus had been growing outside of her uterus, the doctor told news agency AFP on Monday.
The woman was "terrified" of having surgery at the time to remove the remains of the foetus, and instead sought medication for the pain at a local clinic.
Although the pain gradually subsided, it returned years later, forcing the woman to seek medical help in a city hospital, Murtaza Akhtar said.
"She came to us complaining of pain in the abdomen," said Mr Akhtar, head of surgery at the N.K.P. Salve Institute of Medical Sciences in the city of Nagpur.
"This is a case in which the woman got pregnant outside the uterus. She told us she was pregnant in 1978 and it was a mature pregnancy," he said.
Doctors felt a lump on her lower right abdomen and feared it could be cancer -- but further tests and scans revealed a calcified mass.
"A 60-year-old woman with a foetus lying in her abdomen for 36 years is a medical marvel. It's something we had never heard about," said the doctor.
An ectopic pregnancy occurs when the egg implants outside the uterus, usually in the fallopian tubes.
A team of doctors in Nagpur successfully performed surgery to remove the mass that was lodged between the woman's uterus, intestines and bladder.
"She was shocked when she first got to know what had happened. But she is fine now and is recuperating," Mr Akhtar said.
Story First Published: August 26, 2014 15:15 IST
Jayasala 42
I just signed wherever required and came back with disappointment and anger written all over my face. Five minutes and I could not even resist seeing my face as such in the mirror as I crossed the reception wondering what people see in the mirror as they move. I then went to the rest room to wash my face and cheer up a bit. After all, the wait and the expectation were of the past then. Just as I entered, I saw "Repaired! Please use another one!" note above 2 of the 4 taps there. "What the heck!", I thought and waited as they entered. I knew that they were from the building maintenance, from their uniform. One was a bit middle aged, two others were in thirties I guess and one looked like he was in twenties, who quickly sprayed a lot of room freshener in the rest room and that included the place under the wash basins too, and left. Rarely have I seen people communicate so much in looks and so was engrossed in the old man's look. One of the other two quickly said, "Joined last week Sir! He doesn't know much here!". "Don't tell me! He is spraying room freshener like a corporation staff spraying insecticide!", he said. There was no sharpness and even the voice was at level but the message was conveyed. I was just amazed at this and stood by the side. "If these two are not fixed this evening, we'll cancel your contract. Period! We had enough already!", he said and the other two nodded quickly and spread like bees when seeing fire.
Later, I went down a floor to the restaurant and cursed seeing a heavy crowd. Waiting for food, I just reflected how the day went and when my turn came, I asked for something that was just over. The attending lady politely said "Sorry Sir! It just got over!" and I wondered whether my luck preceded me wherever I went. I ordered something else and went to the other queue, where I would be served. Within a couple of minutes, I saw this old lady carrying a heavy box of food items and ice-creams [came to know as she unpacked it and stacked them]. After a minute, she ran to me and said, "Sir! We now have what you asked for. Do you wish to change the order?". I was moved.
I don't see and cannot establish any clear pattern between such people. They are in different social strata yet exhibit the same thing - a lot more clarity and pride in what they are doing, however small or big it may be, with that odd human touch. They may not earn big or talk about that big, I am sure and a few who I know have been treated unfair as well. Yet they just do things with their style printed all over in it. That leaves an impression that stays long.
There I got my lesson and felt a lot better!
All sorted out right? No! My husband is now going through a huge guilt trip about how his mother is unhappy . He has gotten extremely depressed about it and somehow wants things to magically become normal. He also says he is worried, that my limited relationship with his mother will affect our daughter. He feels his mother is 'left out' of everything. This despite her being able to spend a lot of time with my DD who is with the maid and her at home.
I think he feels responsible for his mother's happiness and feels this coldness is impacting it. The less I talk to his mother the greater my peace of mind. However, he is impractical and wants things to be all rosy. I feel lost :(
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It is really good decision.All the best.
Garment business is the best one wherein you can start with 50k.
Buy kurtis,sarees and nighties from whole sale dealers then fix min price and display in your home itself.Invite your area friends and relatives to get the opinion
One of my family friend is living in Malaysia.She is a software engineer and fashion designer.She is designing children costumes and western fits for women.She likes to start her own business in India .she is asking me ideas how she can go with this?
Since i am not into this field i am not able to help her.
Any one can guide how can she proceed?
Hope you all are good.
I wanted to post my this issue since very long but did not post it for some or the other reason.
About my in laws family My husband is the elder son, then BIL, 2 Younger SIL and MIL/PIL. 1 SIL is married.
Me and my husband both are working professional. My problem is I some what feel my BIL and MIL is very cleaver in terms of money. When ever my MIL/PIL and BIL and his wife travel any where they told my husband to book their tickets through IRCTC. My BIL is very well know with computer, FB etc. but he is not good in booking ticketss god knows how much lies in this.
Every times my MIL tells my husband to book this ticket and that ticket they go here and there and that too only in 2nd AC. I always fight my husband as My husband already having loan for his sisters marriage/his own marriage and car Loan. I am pregnant so I also want to save some money for my delivery but my in-laws dont understand this. every time he book the ticket and I fight with him badly we ended up doing fights and nothing else. Nothing is going to be change and I am really pissed off with all this rubbish. My BIL and his wife is in government service so they are also earning good money.
Please suggest how can I ignore this or How can i get out of this problem because every month my husband is spending 10k to 20k on all this. my health is getting effected because of this.
Awaiting for your reply.
All times are GMT +5.5. The time now is 10:39 AM.
Hope all of you are doing fine!
I wanted to take advise from all of you as I really feel I am a dumbass.
Mine was a love marriage and my in laws never wanted this marriage to happen. My FIL is greedy and wanted to mint good money from his son's marriage but that didnt happen, my MIL wanted a Katrina Kaif types bride but I am dusky and have very average features.
My husband is a pet of his parents and his happiness is exactly where his parents' is.
All through the marriage my MIL was crying alongwith SIL(she was also crying). After marriage was over they did not even bless me.
All through the honeymoon my DH tried contacting and pacifying his mom but she talked rudely and this spoilt my DH's mood.
Since then, it's been 4 years and I have been sufferring because of FIL,MIL and DH. Everytime MIL will try to put me down and taunt that am not good looking, dont do kitchen work properly, not social enough, my nature is good and the list is endless.
My DH silently sees all this but does NOTHING, his behaviour towards his parents remains unchanged.
FIL is not good from character also, he has tried to touch me in a way I did'nt like.He stares at me everytime I get ready and come out and will keep on staring and this makes me feel I am standing naked in front of him. He behaves in a way that Father in law will not, he will talk things to a DIL which he should not. I told my DH about this strange behaviour of his father, he said he spoke to him but I DONT THINK SO. He still talks to him and is with him the way he has been.
I am saying I cant say anything to MIL,FIL and SIL, I married him thinking he will safegaurd me but he toppled that thinking that faith of mine.
I sometimes feel, this problem has no solution I must get separated but I look at my parents and imagine the wrath they will face and step back.
Because of all these problem nothing is right between both of us and we are still childless :(
My daughter was born with Heart defect, could not breast feed her, she came home after 2 open heart surgeries and Gtube(the tube connected to tummy to feed milk and food). I had to pump milk every 3 hours and feed her milk thru mouth and whatever she does not take; I had to feed her thru gtube. My life was hell. I could not hold her for first 1 month of her life. Then the problem between me and husband became worse. He was working 2 jobs which we did not want; he wanted to make some money. When my daughter came home, my in laws were there and I cannot ask any help from them. So I asked some help for my husband, he could not find what I was asking and I told him ‘you cannot do one thing which I asked’ it triggered him and hit me while holding the baby in front of MIL. I walked out of the house with baby but My MIL followed me and bought me back home, as soon as I stepped house, my hus kicked me from behind and I am still holding baby. Thankfully my baby was safe. I had bruises and my Mil did not tell me anything not even single word. I have problem with my FIL, he taunts and he keeps making fun of other people. My FIL fought with me and that was my breaking point in my life to not to respect him. I am mom of sick child and going thru so much and my FIL wants to prove his point rt. My IL’s left and my mom came to help me, and she could not bear how my husband was treating and kept asking me if he is taking care of me, my husband used to tell in front of my mom that he will hit and break all my teeth. At one point, I broke down and told her what all happened how he treated and controlling. I am not able to express everything here cos my life is novel. My mom escalated to my dad and more problems began because I informed my parents of his behavior and went thru hell for 3 years. He abused me physically, mentally, emotionally and sexually. There are instances that I was asked to shave my private parts in the middle of the night. I was hit, choked and spit saliva on my face and punish me saying I need to do 10sit up’s sometimes. Went through so much of emotional and mental abuse saying I am burden, I did not have strength to feed my baby, I am waste in this world, my family is gutter, my family is bad omen for him, and my dad promised a property and gold during the wedding and he could not give during the wedding so my husband sent his dad and his mama to my parents’ house to demand whatever my dad has promised, I was shattered. This created more problems, obviously at this pint of my life, I will support my dad and not my husband, any girl would have done the same. It would have been very easy for me to call 911 and I know everyone would have supported me. I did not do that thinking about his future & career. I was blamed and kept nagging about the situation for hours together. Put me thru hell, I have to take care of my baby and her feeding and her physical. I have to get up 5 times in the night to feed her and no help from husband; he used to sleep in different room saying he does not want to sleep with me.
After all this, I finished my college and got a full time job, He wanted his mom n dad to come and help with the baby, I agreed somehow. I had to cook, take care of everyone, no help because I had put a condition that IL’s will take care of baby only. He started abusing me sexually; he wants sex no matter how tired I am. He tells me his body needs sex, and he can hire a maid to help me with the chores and ask me not to get tired. He reminds me today is the sex day and not to get tired. Sometimes if I am sleeping after the long day, wake me up and ask for sex, I consider it as rape for me. I could not say no just to avoid any fights between us. Few times he has asked me if I want to sleep with other Men. He taunts me the way I dress, or put nail polish. He always said he is with me for the sake of my baby; he loves my daughter very much. There were so many fights, blames and he does not even sleep with me on the same bedroom. If he wants something he will come to me and after he is done, nothing to do with me, he will go and call his frens back home and will be on Phone till mid night. So I asked him for divorce and he got scared and started showing me his love but I had already made up my mind to leave and take my baby, I asked divorce twice but he denied. I wanted to share this with somebody so I emailed to ex BF, he started pouring love on me and I fell in love with him but I did not wanted to remarry, I did not wanted to go thru hell but was still confused about the marriage and my relation. I went to India and I planned to visit my Ex to his place, I met him for 2 days and something happened which should not have happened between us. I came back to USA and asked for divorce, he denied and out of frustration I made statements which I should have never made, I told my hus to keep the daughter and I will go away and was asking to sign the divorce paper. And one day I confessed to him that I was in relation with my ex and all the confession was recorded and started using against me. He fwd the recordings to his bro, my uncle and to his female fren. I was devastated; he planned, and made a trap to confess what happened. Then I spoke to my uncle abt wat happened how his treatment. He came and told us to get counselling for all the hurts. I confessed everything to him so that we can start fresh life. But being men he is not able to take the betrayal, I understand . Every day he taunts me, blames me and wants to accept it that’s it’s my entire fault and none of his fault. My point is, if there is broken marriage, the problem is both husband and wife. If he treated me good, why would I end up in this pathetic situation, why would I seek someone’s love? I committed sin which I cannot reverse it. Want to ask the people who are reading this was it my mistake for what happened? I told my husband I will take the responsibility for the sin I committed and he does not want to talk about his taunting, torturing behavior. He comments on girls private part, always crack dirty jokes, tries to flirt around girls…. Tell mean things about how people look… I don’t know what to do? Continue with the marriage or end the marriage. We both went thru counselling, the counsellor said straight on face, I need to support the victim and you have to change the way you talk to your wife or exaggerate the problem so he does not want to go for counselling with me anymore. I never asked or demanded for money or vacations from him. All I wanted is pampering and good love words from him.
