I am a newbie to the group. First of all Thank you to all the lovely ladies who always share a shoulder to lean on and forget the pain.
I am pregnant now and stay in US. My in-laws came to stay with us for 6 months and wanted to apply for extension as well to be with the baby. Right from my 3rd month they are with me. Mine is a love marriage which got arranged. Initially, though they were hiccups I managed smooth relation with everyone in the family. From the day they landed in US, it was tough for me to adjust but within few weeks I was getting along with them. My mil helps in cooking and we both cook together. As I know that they keep getting bored here I used to sit with them and talk almost everything like movies, my friends, relatives and related to my work and my team mates. They used to laugh and enjoy with me. My FIL is physically disabled so doing chores for him is difficult but me and my husband we managed to pull out.
The reason for me to write here today is, bec of nausea I got up early today and suddenly overheard my mil speaking to my sil and she was completely back biting about me and my husband. I was completely shocked to hear that she said" she gets irritated around me and she doesn't like me talking". I felt so bad and today whole day I kept quite from morning. She said we just care about ourselves which was hurting. Ours is a love marriage got arranged and we are relatives too. Initially, they never agreed for marriage and after marriage though they performed everything according to society all rituals they never used to shower affection on me. But, I knew it is common even if it is arranged / love marriage and got adjusted with everything. we both cleared all the house loans of my inlaws and helped with my sil wedding and gifts for every bday, small things became common. First time, after hearing am pregnant everyone started talking with me very nicely. I felt so happy that baby is uniting us and didn't even complain when they wanted to come to usa when am pregnant. But, now it is soo hurting to know that she is back biting to everyone in India and my SIL that we are not taking care of them and am irritating to be around. She doesn't like if I talk to my parents weekly once on calls. So, I stopped talking and emailing them or I talk when I go outside. I took a break from work and doing my masters in parallel. So, I keep getting calls from my friends related to assignments. My FIL everyday sends whatever am doing to my SIL. I ignore stuff because I know that they get bored here. But, now I just don't know how to deal with petty things like this. Why they don't like us no matter what and please tell me some tips so that I just enjoy my pregnancy and at the same time make them happy.
Thank you so much everybody.
Pros with them:
My MIL helps in cooking and since FIL is disabled she sometimes helps me in doing his chores. She gives me orange juice everyday and my fil never allows me to bend if he drops anything on floor like glass of water as he can't even hold things.
Cons with them:
1.They don't like me talking about my parents. 2.They don't like me and husband sitting next to each other or if we talk infront of them cracking any jokes. So, he sits next to his dad and I sit next to his mom in the house. 3.While going out I sacrifice my seat to his mom but I don't feel bothered about it. I am happy sitting in the back with my belly.
4. Everyday phone calls to india and just complaining about stuff here.
5. They just want us to buy gifts while they go to India and very high expectations.
6. Nothing is making them happy. They want my sil and husband to settle here and want us to come back to India.
Pregnant and need help dealing with In-laws.
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