jeudi 30 avril 2015

Adult child Vs Parents

All the parents in the world please listen….

Dear mom and dad,

You have given birth to me, sacrificed lots of things for me, brought books, clothes, paid my school fees, exam fees, college donation what not everything. In return what do you want? Should I definitely return you something??? If so what is it???

You have fantasies before I’m born. While I move about in the womb, you make predictions: “This will be a very active baby; this one’s going to be an athlete.” As years pass, the fantasies change form. You wanted me to be the good boy. I must behave well, be healthy, get first rank always, top university exams for gold medal, get good job. You want me to be the best one who is paid highest amongst all your friends’ sons. You want me to marry the richest person in the community only after earning good amount of money with bank balance, credit cards, own house, rich car etc. You want to show the world that your son is best of all and always do what you like not what he wants do. No need to remind me that somebody’s son has done something for parents. If I’m capable I’ll do more that. A normally functioning adult child will not reject a parent for no reason. There is a reason; the parent likely does not want to confront the reason. For fulfilling all your unrealistic expectations did you ever realize how much pressure, stress and depression I have dealt with? For the sake of your show off how many years you want me to act? I’m your child not a robot.

Demanding from your child who is incapable of meeting your expectation is frustrating. "Woman with 10 grown children collects recyclable items to survive" always creates much attention. We always discuss about old age homes and children who have neglected their parents at old age, but what about very much grown up youngsters who are dying to reach parents expectations. Please don’t make our relationship a business that you have spent for our education and we must return in these forms. Even your business may go loss sometimes, why not me? Please realize that I’m not enjoying in air conditioned office hours instead working hard and harder for you.

Mom n Dad, You can’t be so selfish and unrealistic. Have some compassion for your adult children and help yourselves first and in return your children will not hesitate to help you. The bottom line is that today, in the 21st century, if parents want their children to love them, they need to earn that love. A parent can no longer demand love, or try to manipulate it through belittling, guilt and martyrdom or because of a shared genetic lineage.

Your child

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Adult child Vs Parents

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