Stingy In laws

A bit of background on my marriage. It is an arranged marriage and my wife is from a different state in North India than where my family hails. The courtship period was fantastic. Although I personally do not believe in a concept of a soul mate, it looks like both of us could live a life with one another. In the marriage, have taken no dowry and my dad was able to get the girls side some very good deals and the expenditure of an entire grand North Indian marriage was barely 6 laks for the girls side. Way higher on our side, strangely. A few stingy dialogues from MIL happened during the marriage (for ex., about the rituals followed saying they will only bring what is 'exactly' required and not one item more (whatever is distributed to the relatives) (items were silly things like a blanket)) To me that was a flag about her mentality. Nevertheless, thankfully she seems to be an alright woman.

The festivals in the first year of the marriage have to be celebrated by the girls side. Even if they dont, at least a dozen phone calls are expected giving greetings etc. Unfortunately my in laws didnt do any of that. Which has ticked mom and dad off like anything. Although I could care less, I also felt a little bad.

Now we are expecting a baby and as per ritual wife is expected to go to her parents house for the first child. Even as we are deliberating whether we want the kid to be born in Australia, where we are, or in India - assuming we will choose Australia, my wife wants me to pay for her parents tickets to Australia.

My wife also has an elder brother and a younger. Elder one earning well and is saving money to pay his EMIs on his new flat. So that he does not incur more expenditure, he sent his wife to live with his mom. I would almost like to believe this shows the cheapness in the genes. But I dont live his life and I dont know his battles. Her parents had openly said since our daughter is earning we have nothing to worry about.

I am almost amazed at my ILs cheapness. Can a parent not think, that if their daughter is sponsoring their trip, then their daughters family's financial situation is messing up ? I am trying to save for a house, which since the last 10 years has kept on repeatedly looking like a distant dream. With dad's unforesightedness and bad financial decisions, I am the one who has been pulling the family, financially, for quite a long time now..

I am even more amazed at my wife, who started working at a child care center hardly 2 months ago. However, when she began the job and was not pregnant, we had an informal discussion that she would like to sponsor her parents visit to AU sometime in future.

We have already had a big fight about how she cannot decide on what she does with her salary for her own self, like I dont decide what I do with my salary for myself. A bit drama on how a girls father feels proud that he is able to fly internationally on his daughters money etc.

Are most in laws this way ? My mind is almost perplexed in what it wants to think. I just feel a little sad over all I think. I dont know how I want to deal with my in laws. I think all this will pass as the mind cools down - but - I dont know why am posting here. What do you all think ?

Stingy In laws